I think as adoptive parents we have this fear that is always hidden within if we don’t call it out.
That fear is whether we admit it or not: What if they change their minds or what if they get too close? Strangely enough, I think it takes root not within that time period of waiting but after all the paper work has been signed. I think it’s truly Satan’s way of trying to keep healing and connection from happening between adoptive and birth parents. It’s like an alarm going off telling you to run because it’s all done.
I truly believe this fear keeps us from loving our birth parents well. I think it prevents us from keeping our promises and our communication open. The scary thing is that we think we’re doing this to keep our kids safe, but we’re doing more harm then good and we’re missing out on something that we can’t even comprehend.
I believe that when we love our birth parents well, it allows a greater love story of family to be created.
Fear is a liar and we are not called to walk in fear.
We are called to use wisdom within certain situations as needed, but we are also called to love extravagantly. What better example of that then to love all members of the triad with that type of love.